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Just me and the color blue.

Monday, May 30, 2016


Some days I lie still thinking of those little hands
Just closed gripping tight
A child not more than a year old
He seems to have a lot on his mind

There is a hidden fear in him on that stranger's lap
I keep seeing that image over and over again

His little frown tugged at my heart
I am struck with sadness at the thought
Of his status as a young refugee

How sad it is that he's in dire straits
The strife not his doing, his life so unclear

Will he someday see the world
Build a school to teach like him
Have the once happiness now denied him
Would he ever be a child first

No, I don't think he will ever be a child first
For he's an adult with a constant frown
The world is full of strangers for him
He's lost his childhood, brotherhood and livelihood
He is an orphaned one 
He is the troubled child

He will be chasing the light
In woods of green
Finding his way through branches that sway
Looking for the light
That will pave the way
To survive just for another day!

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Thursday, May 12, 2016

Chasing that Illusive "Peace"

Image result for free image of peace

Peace and what that word conjures up is really not what one can explain at great length.  Peace or the lack of it comes in various forms to different people and it varies in different cultures with different meanings.

For the war torn, peace comes in the form of security from strive and they stalk the freedom they yearn to live their lives the way they want with their families. Imagine being taken away from your own and put in a different and frightening environment. Imagine watching someone die, especially a loved one right in front of your eyes.
For an avid traveler, peace comes in the form of the beauty of nature. Sunrise on tropical horizons, sunsets and the welcoming of dusk, watching the moon over a clear dark sky, taking in the beauty of the mountains and valleys below and of course the sights of new places and of high-rises and such.  A world that has grown with development.
For a child, peace comes in the form of sleep. A peaceful rendezvous after a day of turbulence.
For a parent, chasing that illusive peace will be a lifelong situation. The constant nagging of everyday life bearing upon them by worrying about the welfare and safety of their children and their families as being uppermost.

Peace - where do we even begin as we analyse the political situation of a country. It augurs well to remember that the inhabitants of earth are greatly disrupted by the lack of it. Every one life is directly or indirectly affected. You can be miles away from a region of war or catastrophes and still be affected by the turmoil therein a displaced society. With the world now integrated by technology, each one of us have someone or other in every part of the world. We are more or less related someway or other.

Peace - I look to the view outside my window in the mornings. Trees looming over rooftops with the gentle clouds passing over in a pastel blue cascade of the sky. There is an insecurity within me when I think of peace. Much too much of anxiety and troubles coincide with daily life these days. 
Sometimes waking up the next day is peace by itself.

Life  is a constant struggle to chase that illusive "Peace".

All rights reserved. Copyright@shobana2016

Wednesday, May 4, 2016

Teacher Be Thy Name

How old was I
When I met you
From the womb to the classroom
A different teacher groomed

Each lesson I learnt to value
Before I valued I had to learn
And who but thee
Could I trust to guide

You have such an important name
One that conquers Man and His Dream
To mould me into the one I Am
And I in turn live and share the lessons taught
And put to practice the preacher's notes

You play the part of a guiding light
And none can match your arduous task
If the world is a literate one
There's none to thank than the Masters of thy art..

Teacher be Thy Name.

All rights reserved. Copyright@shobana2016

Monday, May 2, 2016

Coming Out - There were days when I thought I would die...(A True Story)

Brought up with strict Christian values, I remember having a lot of conversations with God. I always knew I was special. I remember being in a car accident a few months after birth with my parents. It was a red car - a Triumph and Dad was stationed in Singapore then. He worked for the Air Force. My mom said that it was a miracle we survived the crash.

At six I was sent to stay with my Grandma so that I could go to school without any interruptions. Dad was posted to Kuching, Sarawak and my family was travelling quite a bit. Grandma used to wake me up at 5.00am so that we could go for the 6.00am mass before she sent me to school nearby the church. It was a Catholic School. It was a must to say the rosary at 7.00pm everyday at home.

I used to go to church I remember even during my work days in a bank during lunch breaks. The same church I used to go with my Grandma. Sitting in the church I would speak to Mother Mary and the Lord Jesus and just gaze at their serenity and relish in their peacefulness. There was always something missing in my life. Something I couldn't place my finger on and would come to know only when I had the honor and privilege of having raised my kids as a Doctor and a Lawyer and when I started writing upon the sudden demise of my youngest brother in 2007. My brother was the catalyst in my finding the passion and love of writing poetry.

I began to feel exhilaration just watching my poems come alive. My ability to delve into my sub-conscious mind and create beautiful inscriptions based on an image that only the gentle nudging of the Lord can relate to was an inspiration to me. I am sure it is Him and His presence when I write.

I went to a Catholic College to do my Pre-University run by nuns. Every given day was in honor of the Lord. I did not complete my degree as I guess God had other plans for me. 

I write in brief of my upbringing to let you know of my Catholic surroundings as I was growing up which instilled in me my beliefs.

After I started writing, I could sense a degree of evil and sinfulness surrounding me. Pagans, black magic and witch craft with evil men and women who kill and take innocent lives for the sake of a twisted belief in their religion. They still are after me. After years of abuse in their hands via satellite and otherwise, God sent an army of men via the same channel to rescue me - God's own army that he handpicked I believe. All through the days of abuse in the hands of evil, God was there with me. I sleep with my rosary in hand. Clasping it tight and calling out to the Lord on days that their evil rituals are directed at me. How would have I survived otherwise?

I have escaped many times from the hands of death. My God walks ahead of me and the army behind me I tell them - the evil doers. Many a time, they have possessed me with evil spirits but my faith being strong and with the priests and religious praying incessantly for me, they have failed miserably in killing me. They have lost their souls to the same devil that they use to attack me and the innocents. 

There were days when I thought I would die, lying on my bed clasping the rosary and crying out the name of the Lord. The pain was unbearable some days and they tortured me relentlessly. The thought of my husband and children kept me going. There were days when the pain wrecked through me like thunderbolts and I asked the Lord to release me from this suffering and take me back to his Kingdom.
I was never sure if I would wake up the next day.

They came in millions but I bear testament of the fact that the Lord Jesus kept me alive and have to a certain degree given me victory over their evil deeds. Now all I can hear and read is that their deceit and snares are falling apart - just like a deck of cards, crumbling!
They are killing their own and their lives are now being tortured by the same evil spirits that they had control over.

I don't know why God chose this life for me. Maybe because of the conversations I used to have with him as a young child. I have many more out there who are waiting to kill me. But I have put my footprints where it matters and God and His Army of Men have now been positioned to take over if anything happens to me. My legacy will be followed by the millions too.

It is a miracle I survived thus far and there are many out there who will bear testament to this.
(to be continued)

All rights reserved. Copyright@shobana2016

Goddess of Song

My Poem "Goddess of Song" was accepted and published in the February 2018 issue of the Enchanted Conversation Magazine :- Read...